another day another poem thats badly writen

there is a feeling
that tightens my chest
shortens my breath
and causes me to cry

there is a throb
where my heart should have been
that never goes away
it hurts all day

these tears fall
like water in a stream
unable to break them
not even the screams

i reach out
for someone
but im all alone
nobody cares
theres nobody home

nobody sees my pain
or hears me cry
i lock it all up
deing inside

my chest feels heavy
the pain just grows
and everyday
i study my life more

they look at me
with hurtfull eyes
with meanful words
that fly

i pretend to not care
i hide the pain
i look away
and go on with my day

the never ending pain full day
the never ending agony of night
mixed all together
with tears in my eyes

another day, another almost death

in my life time there seems to be alot of near death acidents, or illnessis. so if your reading this you know im alive lol. my friend kenz came over to hang out and she was bored and really tired so she was going to go home it was 12midnight. and my mother calls saying she ripped her pants so we get in the car and are going way to fast in the nayberhood. and kenz fogot that we have speed bump ditches. and she didnt slow down and we hit them hard car flew forward back end picked up and we were thrusted into the ground then she keeps going omg it hurt sooo bad i was almost crying. she is a fucking idiot. now we get on bangador high way and are driving we turn left and keep driving no red lights so we never had to slow down. we get to my moms old conoco and we have to slow down car tut tut tuts to a stop while were turning the corner on the road and the car dies. its the worst spot to be when theres cars comeing and its a blind spot. she wont let me push it off the road into the white zone. and omg i thought i was going to die for the second time today. shes the worst driver out there!!!!!

love katie

I AM A BLOND

i was reading your my girlfriend. and then everything went black thats all i could see. i freaked and screamed ahhhh. then i opend my eyes. I BLINKED!! how blond can i be. yea this is only one thing im soo blond that i was reading a book once and my brother comes in and askes me if his picture looks ok. i replayd IM FINE. my god whats wrong with me. and sometimes i forget how to swallow when i drink something its sad so i spit it out. or i mix up my words like i cant remember what it is and i go threw a list of words till i get it right and itl be the most comon thing. or ill trip over air. or say something reallly weird. i even lose my english i start talking in giberish its fucking anoying im soooo weird.

yea yea

love katie

(took me 4 trys to speell my name right) aktie << was the first try hahahahaha

just another day

well kayla came over today. with her dogs, which in my case was a bad idea. stupid dollie runs out the door and the other dogs attacked her. anyway kayla took her dogs home and then came back. we all hung out in the motor home, which is decked out. they put a dvd player in there and a flat screen tv. theres a new raido and its all cleaned better. then there going to fix it up more get it licencd then we can use it. my cell isnt working im worried that jacob will call and i wont be able to speak to him. i havent talked to sarah i hope this number i have is hers so if i txt her its her ill be glade shes a great friend yup yup. havent talked to kenz since she slept over shes such a bitch. i fucking hate her.

love you
katie

I DONT NEED IT!! I NEED IT!!

i need money

ok i really need cash grrr. more like a good paying job or something. i havent been doing much had kenz over. phone broke so its no use using it and iv been watching laura alot shes soo anoying grrr. we bought a motorhome its preetty cute. rondo and laura had gone to the hospital. both have infections its totally sad. kayla cant hire me i was too slow to get an app. grrrr life sucks. and i dont know if i can sale anything at a yard sale but i should make a list right ok

love katie

not alot has happend. i went to my friends/cuzins graduation. it lasted forever and i was really sick. before we got there mom took me to a restorant chines it was great and yummi. before that we were at rondos thing he got an award kool huh. then i was told to clean my room. so iv been cleaning it even tho im sick. me and kenz had a fight. but were friends again. larua went to hospital she has and infection and is sick. we were worried she had the flu but she doesnt thats great huh. my kittens are great. mia pissed me off tho she poed all over in my closet and i had to clean it all up. it was disgusting i want to scream. but i love her too much. my room looks alot better. but im not finished i have to much books. and not enough space. my closet is stuffed to maximum after i cleaned it sucks yes. but in my room theres lots of space. but still lots more to do. i mizz sarah and jacob, i hope he calls me soon... i might get a job with kayla thatl be great right. she is the booss of dry cleaning. spencer added me as a friend on one of my meny myspace profiles thats great huh. on gaia i got demonic ear things it was amazing out of a gift box from my fish tank saweet huh. im watching naruto again its great. im curently reading about 15 diff storys :) dont ask but im great at keeping them all straight :). i cant wait for new moon to come on. and my trip to arizona. im gana work out everyday and im ganna help make a food plane for everynight. itl be great. i want to go to wasabie its a japanes resurant with miso soup i really want to try that. but my fam wont do it so this sucks. but maybe in the future ill get too.

iv disided to never love. iv never had a bf, never been kissed. frankly i dont want to... ok i do but then i really dont. i dont want that i do but really dont. i feel like im in the 3rd grade freaking dont want a bf but i cant say tat. not after the kasy thing in 3rd grade. see i can say he was a first sort of love. he was there for me called me even hung out with me at skool even tho ppl didnt do that with me. he said he liked me.. we were alot alike him and i. but he disapeared, and theres not picture of him...it akes me sad.. well this is all for now

love katie

mr manga

perfect girl evolution is great :) watching naruto again. and case closed :) and elfen lied. :) wish me good luck ya ya. saw neww moon pre veiw it looks wickedly awesome ya :) jess mean like always but thats ok laura is evil lover her tho rondo is still rondo. i think kenz hates me but w/e right :) i think im going to get a job asap wish me luck world :)

SKOOL ENDS!

monday was the last skool day :( i didnt go off cource. but tuesday was the BBQ and i did go :). it was lots of fun. it started like this i woke up at 8:45 am got up got dressed strightend my hair, called auntie carul she didnt pick up. i went up stiars got on putter. then my older sister got home she took me to a shopko in far away land of down weird area. it was hot in there and she talked alot. i txted sarah alot. then we drove to moms work almost got hit and pulled over but didnt. then we get to moms work and jess car is not working well its very skrettchy :) funny huh. then she takes me to skool while turning on a line she tied her keychain to wheel we almost died!! then about 60 sec latter a truck trys to run us over. i get to skoool and sarah thought iw as sloow. hahaha she waited for me outside. we walk inside and we stand in front of doors for about 10-15 mins waiting and talking then we go get our year books :). which i had to give my recipet and then i got it. then we stood looking at them and some of sarahs friends were talking to us. then alex comes to me and we sign each others year books. then she walks away then jacob comes and hes with us. lol he kept hitting me with a book. and teasing me :( meanie. hes says hes going to call me and sarah over the summer so we can chill. he signed my yearbook so did sarah. then we tryd to get jacob to take us to wally world but he said no hes the only one with a car. then he huged sarah and tryd to hug me :( lol i hit him then he left :( then me sarah and alex walk up stairs and chillax for a while then we go back to everyone and hug out with sarahs lezb friends which was interesting. then we listend to a band that sucked but i like um somewhat. :) walked around. then when we disided to leave i couldnt find a ride. so i asked sarah if her dad could take me to conoco he said ok i felt normal in there car which is weird. :) cuz im normaly nervouse or w/e it was lots of fun :)

im going to miss sarah, jake, alex, amanda :) i get to see them tho thats a good thing right :)